What NOT to Say: Part Two

I'm finally getting around to sharing the second part in our series on men saying exactly the wrong thing at exactly the wrong moment. You may want to refresh your memory on Part One, starring Awkward Guy.

That very same night I was at dinner with some friends. Two guys were sitting across from me at the table and we were all chatting about various subjects. In the middle of one conversation, one of the guys stopped, looked at my necklace and said "LJ, what exactly is that?" Ummm...it's a necklace, I pointed out. Now granted, it was an elaborate necklace with a ribbon rosette and asymmetrical style. "Some people would call it a 'statement' necklace," I elaborated. The second guy chimed in "what statement is it supposed to be making?"

"It's saying I'm fabulous," I quickly replied.
"No, it's not saying that," he said, without a pause.

Excuse me? I'd like to take this opportunity to make a Public Service Announcement. Any time a lady makes a reference about her fabulousness, DON'T REFUTE HER! Isn't this somewhere in the How to Talk to Ladies Manual or something?

Ok...back to my story. I'm pretty sure the look on my face communicated exactly how foolish his statement had been. But just in case, I followed up with a "are you sure that's really what you meant to say?"

"No...no...I meant that you don't NEED a necklace to prove how fabulous you are. The necklace doesn't define you. I mean it's not about the necklace..." he fumbled.

Uh huh.

Now this is the point at which the first guy could have really saved the day and make himself look really good at the same time. How many of you think he pulled it off? Any takers? I didn't think so.

"I think your necklace is...interesting," he said.

Wow. That's a fantastic compliment, if ever I heard one. It's like I'm wearing a science experiment. Interesting.

Now I will say these two guys did make a good effort at redeeming themselves. I pointed out to them the amazing cluelessness of their comments to me and the fact that they needed some serious help in how to compliment a lady. At which point, the first guy amended his statement to say "I think your necklace is lovely" and the second guy jumped in with "No, Laurie. YOU are lovely."

I think it's time for me to put on a workshop. If you need as much help as these two guys, sign up here. Ladies, feel free to submit applications on behalf of any men you know who need serious intervention.