Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Revenge of the televangelists

Every once in awhile, I volunteer in my church bookstore. I'm in charge of running a register and helping with customers. Last Sunday, the store was very quiet and only one other volunteer was in there with me. The phone rang and I answered it, hearing an unusual voice on the other end. I couldn't decide if the caller was a man or a woman...it was definitely an older person with a high pitched voice.

The caller asked me my name and I told him/her. Then he/she said "can you find out if your store carries a book I'm looking for?" "Of course," I replied. "It's called I Was Healed, by Benny Hinn," the caller informed me.

Ummm. Houston, we have a problem.

Now I didn't want to be rude to this older she-male on the phone, but I also knew that there was no way my church would carry any of Benny Hinn's books or products. I wasn't sure how to tell her/him that, so I politely said "I don't think we carry that, but let me check our inventory and make sure."

I put the caller on hold and told the other volunteer that this person was looking for a book by Benny Hinn and if we somehow carried it I was quitting then and there.

Of course, it wasn't in our inventory. I got back on the phone and said "I'm so sorry, we don't carry any of Benny Hinn's books."
The caller responded "oh honey I wish you had that book. It's so amazing. I've been a member of the church for 20 years and it's one of the most beautiful books I've ever read. Benny Hinn writes about finding a treasure box and then he opens the box. And do you know what's inside that box?"
"Um, no," I say.
All of a sudden the person's voice changes to a man's voice with a normal pitch and he says "it was filled with a load of crap like I'm giving you!"

I was speechless. The guy starts cracking up laughing, saying "oh I got you! I got you good!" Turns out it was a friend of mine from the church, calling just to mess with me.

He did get me. He got me good. But you know what they say about payback...it's a...hassle.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Shut down your blog right now. You'll NEVER top that!

-WTHM

Shanna said...

First does sell Joel Osteen's books. Benny Hinn isn't too far off. :)

Laurie said...

For the record, First does not sell Joel Osteen books. That was under a previous bookstore administration. :)

Anonymous said...

Hahaha! That's funny!

-Jared