Dear Creepy Guy,
I don't know how to tell you this in person: You make my skin crawl. I know you think you're flirting...and it probably works on some girls. But bar-style pick-up lines don't do it for me...especially when there's no alcohol to dull the senses and make your not-so-subtle comments seem more amusing and clever. Oh, and I can see you checking out that other girl across the table. I find it hard to take your come-ons seriously when you seem to be using a shotgun approach instead of the infinitely preferable sniper attack. We're not stupid, you know. We can tell when you're just on the prowl for a date -- ANY date. It really doesn't come across as flattering when you seem that desperate.
I'm glad we had this little chat. Thanks for listening.