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I really just don't have any fun or lighthearted things to blog about right now. The holidays are difficult. Family time can be hard. Nothing in particular happened on Thanksgiving. It's not like there was drama. I love the holidays. But it's a bittersweet time for me. As much as I love it, it's also a very painful season for me.

I remember, when I was little, how Christmas morning was the most magical, wonderful time. My mom would get up early and bake orange sweet rolls and make hot chocolate. My dad would build a fire (when it was cold enough). My brother and I would grab our slippers and blankets and sit in front of the fire. It was usually my job to distribute the gifts to each person. Once all the presents were handed out, we would each take turns opening one. We always saved our stockings for last. Mom always thought of the best stocking stuffers. Sometimes they were funny -- a kitty-litter sifter. Sometimes they were tasty -- chocolate-covered hazelnuts. Sometimes they were the "big" gifts -- diamond earrings.

After all the presents were opened, it was time to start cooking and preparing for the family feast. The rest of the day was spent in eating, playing with/admiring presents, napping, watching Christmas movies, playing games and eating again. We would usually end up with a brisk walk around the neighborhood to look at the Christmas lights and greet the neighbors.

Christmas is different now. My brother and I are grown. My mom works a lot, so she's too tired to do much decorating or shopping for Christmas. My dad...well...my dad is my dad. Suffice it to say he's not the same man he used to be. We don't have any kids in our family, so there's not that same sense of unbridled excitement and anticipation.

Looking ahead to the next few weeks, I am filled with nostalgia. I smile over the special moments and cry over the things I miss. I am reminded that Christmas is still a magical, wonderful time. The sorrow I feel is temporal. But the joy of knowing Christ is eternal. That joy cannot be diminished by circumstances, relationships, pain or need. And the full beauty of this season comes from walking with my Redeemer, who binds up the broken-hearted.

"Thus says the LORD: In this place of which you say, 'It is a waste without man or beast,' in the cities of Judah and the streets of Jerusalem that are desolate, without man or inhabitant or beast, there shall be heard again the voice of mirth and the voice of gladness, the voice of the bridegroom and the voice of the bride, the voices of those who sing, as they bring thank offerings to the house of the LORD: 'Give thanks to the LORD of hosts, for the LORD is good, for his steadfast love endures forever.'" Jeremiah 33:10-11