Things that are true (for me) about having a boyfriend

1. I buy more beef than I did before.


2. I watch more dumb movies than I did before.


3. I listen to more weird music than I did before.


4. I have to clean my house more than I did before.


5. I drive less than I did before.


6. I use more cell phone minutes than I did before.


7. I freshen my make-up more than I did before.


8. I stay up later than I did before.


9. I have to explain myself more than I did before.


10. I am happier than I ever was before.

The Fear Factor

Fear can be a strong motivator for many of us. Unfortunately, it often motivates us to behave irrationally, make unsound decisions or remain paralyzed in places that simply aren't good for us.

Fear, in other words, can make us pretty stupid.

I know this because I recently went through a break-up based almost entirely on fear. Both myself and the guy I was dating made our decisions based on the unknowns, rather than the facts. We got so caught up in the fear of "what nexts" and "what ifs" that we sabotaged the realities of "right now."

But fear isn't always a profound philosophical quandary. Sometimes fear is a cockroach under your coffee table. You get home in the evening, see something down there under the table, run to get the Raid...and you let your fear empower you to spray that MoFo to oblivion.

It's not until after you have released half the can of Raid that you realize you just annihilated...a piece of fabric. Yes, friends, I Raided a scrap of fibers. I screamed while doing so. Note to self: Turn on all the lights before jumping to conclusions about cockroach invasions.

And maybe turn the emotional light on and take your finger off the fear trigger before you Raid someone's intentions and feelings about you. Maybe the scraps of fabric in your life just need to be picked up off the carpet, rather than poisoned and paralyzed.

Make an effort to let reality be your guide, whether you're facing a relationship or a roach.